Up too late, always

I just moved into a new apartment and it's soooo pretty! I live with my boyfriend! His name is Talli and he is also very pretty. I have never lived with a boy who was more than a friend. I have never had to share a closet before!! It's hard!!

Life is good.

So I didn't get the job last week. I'm trying to figure out where to go from here. I can most likely get funded training through EI so I'm thinking some schooling might be the way to go. Although thinking about going back fills me with icy terror.

There is a two year communications program at Capilano College that looks good. They also have an 8 month "Advanced Professional Communications Certificate" but I'm not sure if that'll be enough to get me ready for a sparkling career in communications/media realtions/pr.

Does anyone have any advice? Do I need to go to school? (I didn't finish my degree) Does anyone know anyone in this field that I could talk to? I'm trying to set up some informational interviews but I'm at a loss of where to start.

Last night I had a long involved dream that I had cancer. My parents had thrown a boozy party at the house I grew up in.  Everyone I've ever known was there and I kept telling people that I had cancer. It was a sad but oddly comforting dream.

Today I find out about the job. Sounds like it might involve writing massive amounts of content for a wiki. Cross your fingers and pray for me.

I had a job interview last week. I want the job very very much. It is a writing job with lots of research about tons of interesting things. There are health benefits and regular hours. The company seems fantastic and progressive and exciting. I have decided I am going to get the job. I should have a second interview this week. The only drawback is that it is in Richmond and the bus doen't even go there. I guess I'll have to procure myself some sort of vehicle.

Yesterday I went to work and then left to go bum around downtown because I didn't have any clients until 5. I went to the art gallery. There was an exhibit called Truth and Beauty. It was a survey of pictorialist photography and was breath-taking. 

Next weekend I am going to Victoria for Ashley's Birthday. Hopefully Taylor is going to come along.

Ha ha!

It's been forever since I posted. Life is changing. I am recovering from my car accident. I work a few hours a day which is more to get me out of the house than to pay the rent. I've realized I need to change careers. I start a career exploration course tomorrow. It's 7 days of aptitude and personality testing. Kinda like CAPP. I'm thinking very seriously about PR. There is a 2 year program at Kwantlen and a 12 week program at Langara. They cost the same, oddly enough. I'm trying to figure out how much training I need. It's hard muddling out the difference between my inferiority complex and an honest appraisal of my skills and abilities.

ICBC and my parents have kept my head above water for the last few months. Hopefully EI will kick in any day now...

I am falling in love with Vancouver. I really like living here. I worry that I'm too much of a homebody but it feels good to spend time alone.

I miss livejournal.

OMG. Are you ready for the most ridiculous story ever in time?

On Thursday I got all dressed up for work. Heels and lipstick and the a pretty dress because it was a sunny day and life is awesome. I was at work, just working away, and my back started hurting and I was all like, oh no, not this again. And then it started hurting a lot and then I couldn't stand up and then I couldn't move. We had to call the ambulance and I went to the hospital and they gave me some morphine and a prescription and sent me on my way.

My roomate Kim came to pick me up and I could barely get in the car and then a block away from the hospital someone made a left hand turn in front of us and we hit them pretty hard. I went BACK to the hospital in the ambulance. And now everything hurts.

I'll be okay. I'm getting better. It just really really sucks.

Well that was a fun winter. On to Spring.

Things have changed many times since I've been in Vancouver. I feel like I've lived 10 different lives in only 7 months.

I left my job at Rain and started working at a new salon on the edge of Gastown called Bangtown. I love it. It is an enormous switch. I am having so much fun helping to decorate and get things running smoothly. You all have to come visit it. I feel like someone built me a salon. It is just me and one other girl full-time.

My burgeoning relationship seems to have derailed and I doubt that it was ever what I thought it was. It's so easy to be blinded by a bit of romance. Especially when one is starved for romance. But I'm enjoying a new found feeling of detachment from the outcome of things. Which feels healthy. For the first time in my life I am feeling confident in what I want and unwilling to give that up for a tenuous feeling of being wanted.

I am registering for a writing class at Emily Carr (continuing studies) for the new year. I'm excited to have a few writing deadlines in my life. It is a class designed for people with writing projects that are stuck. Now I just have to figure out which project to focus on.

Wearing my embryonic halloween costume (Yellow tights, booty shorts, feathers soon to follow) and drinking red wine while dancing with my new roomates, life is so good.

There are big decisions coming up but they excite me more than anything.

My back is out; I am heavily drugged up so that I can walk; and it has been pouring rain all day, which makes moving with a pickup truck not such a good idea. But the worst is over. And it already kinda feels like home.

Oh Jeez,

I'm in smit... It's been a while, I forget how it works.

Also, I'm about to attempt moving in the rain with a pickup truck. Is this some sort of Vancouver test?

8 boxes of books isn't too excessive, is it? I mean, they are small boxes...

Expect frequent livejournal posts as I attempt to pack up my house. This is how I procrastinate. Please comment with infammatory posts or anything that might create some sort of internet drama so that my inbox is clogged with emails, thus giving me an excuse to check it hourly.

Dating sucks. I hate the waiting, "try to guess what the other person is thinking and why haven't they called yet is it because I put out too soon", I'll just check my email again game. You know that one?

tra la la la

the universe is a funny place.
tee hee!!

We found a place to live!! It isn't the place we were waiting on but it is equally as awesome! It is at Fraser and 13th. There are two decks! My bedroom may be purple and have an on-suite bathroom. Washer and Dryer in the apartment! I am very very excited!! I haven't seen it yet. We might get to move in early which would be so so awesome. It's cheaper than the other place too. $1500! Did I mention that there is a FIREPLACE???

I could see my breath hovering in front of me as I walked home tonight.I'm three days away from 28. It doesn't seem like my birthday.

We are waiting to hear about a house. I want it so bad. It's perfect. I've spent the last few days visualizing myself living there. That'll convince them to let us live there right? Conviction.

 I don't know what is up with me. I haven't felt this anxious since I can't remember when. I just had an anxiety attack at the grocery store. Good times.

My first visit back to Victoria has been as tumultuous as I expected. It has been so good to see people. I miss all the random running into people that happens here. It's also amazing and comforting to know that I am part of a community of people here. But it makes my current rootlessness all the more acute.

I've been doing so much thinking about what I want in my life and I've realized that I'm not happy. I think my upcoming move is the first step but there are other things that need to change. I need enough money to live comfortably. I need more friends and creativity and downtime. I feel like the summer passed in a blur of work, and nothing else. I will find a good home and then examine the other parts of my life. First things first.

Part of me wants to not go back to Vancouver. Just pick a tree in Beacon Hill Park and climb up into the leaves and hide. But it is exhausting when every inch of a place is thick with memories, good and bad. I like the freshness of my life in Vancouver.

This has been a roller coaster ride of a few days. Sangria and friends and good food and more friends and brutal choices and regret and relief and acupuncture sessions and exciting plans for creative self-expression and too much nostalgia.

Everything is going to be okay. Right?